Author Topic: Pirate Campaign  (Read 2285 times)

Durandal

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Re: Pirate Campaign
« Reply #15 on: December 13, 2013, 08:12:29 pm »
(Alright, some of you are going to recognize this next piece, as I'm doing some copy/paste from my old material.  But there is still no better way to introduce this next character.)

Tobias milled about the bar as the stench smoke, alcohol, and engine grease permeated through the air.  If he was going to find a pilot crazy enough to follow him, it would be here.  So far however, anyone he told his story to ran in the other direction faster than a Salarian on methamphetamine.  He had about given up hope when he just so happened to stumble upon quite an interesting conversation between a Baratian and a Hanar.

“This one has noticed that the sum of the compensation you have provided is merely half of the agreed upon amount. Were you displeased with its piloting performance?” The Hanar spoke in that eerily precise and echoing voice that their race was known for, bioluminescent glows accompanying his every word.

“Nah you were actually pretty damn good. But that’s all you’re getting. Now take it and get the hell out of here you damn jellyfish.” The Batarian dismissed the Hanar like a child.

“This one would like to remind you that all Hanar possess toxic stinging cells within their external appendages. If you do not provide the agreed upon sum, it would feel no guilt in inserting one of its appendages at such an extreme depth in you rectal cavity that you would experience the taste of, as you eloquently said, “jellyfish.” It would be a most unpleasant experience.”

Wait...Did he just threaten to stick his tentacle up that guy's ass?  Tobias thought to himself.

“What? Just…get the hell out of here.” The Batarian replied, visibly angrier this time. Clearly he did not get the message.

“It appears cultural differences in linguistics did not convey this one’s threat adequately to your primitive temporal lobes. Perhaps this would be a more suitable gesture.” And almost as soon as the Hanar finished that sentence, one of his front tentacles reached up into the underside of his body, retrieving an M-3 Predator pistol. The Baratian’s eyes shot open. You could see that he clearly didn’t expect this. And so the Hanar squeezed his pink jelly-like appendage, sending a round into the kneecap of the Batarian. The crack of the shot caused the bar to momentarily pause and look in his direction. But an instant later everyone was back to their business.

“What the ****!” The Batarian shouted, clutching his bloodied and mangled kneecap.

“This one urges you to provide the agreed upon sum, or its next shot will be directed towards your frontal lobe.”

“Ok ok! Here! Just leave me the hell alone!” The Batarian tossed a credit chit in the direction of the Hanar, to which it deftly snatched from the air with one of its many free tentacles.

I think I've found my pilot  Tobias thought as he walked up towards the Hanar.

"Excuse me my Hanar friend, but can I get your name?"

The floating jellyfish turned to face Tobias, or at least whatever was considered to be the front of him turned to face.

"This one's face name is Clintofantoma.  But you may refer to it as Clint."  The Hanar spoke/echoed out into the room.

"A pleasure.  I am Captain Tobias Westen, and I may have a job suitable to your skills."

"This one simply has two questions.  Does it pay well?  And is it dangerous?"

Tobias was going to like his new friend.